When it comes to children, one is one, but two are twenty. Too many children can be stressful for many, but it seems as though proud parents of three are mostly challenged in their role. What is more, many studies have now showed that parents of three show higher stress levels that parents who have one, two or four children and counting. So, is it the number itself? Is there an invisible barrier which should be overcome?
Three is a Party for the Family
According to a 2013 survey, mothers who have three children face more daily stress than other mothers. The survey involved 7,164 mothers across America. The results of the study showed that mothers of three have an average stress level of 8.5, 10 being the highest. Also, the survey showed that 60% of the moms complained about their girls, rather their boys.
‘Going from one to two was an easy, breezy transition,’ noted Jill Smokler, a mom who participated in the survey. ‘Two to three, everything was turned upside down. I did not feel like I had it together…just crossing the street and not being able to physically hold all their hands. I found this tremendously stressful.’
Naturally, one would think that mothers of four would have a rougher time disciplining them. However, Dr. Janet Taylor explains that three kids is actually a limit parents have. When you reach three kids you can still stress out, but surpassing the number will simultaneously reduce your stress levels.
‘There’s just not enough space in your head for perfectionism when you get to four or more kids. The more children you have, the more confident you become in your parenting abilities. You have to let go … and then you’re just thankful when they all get to school on time.’
The survey officially showed the following statistics:
- 46% of the moms confirm their partner stresses them out more than they children.
- 72% of the moms are obsessing over stress in general, therefore make themselves more stressed.
- 60% of the moms note that they often don’t have the time to do everything.
- 9 out of 10 of the moms state that they fear becoming unattractive to their partners.
‘When it comes to kids, three is the magic number…for stress,’ once said Chelsea Clinton. And she is right. Women are astounding but we rush ourselves to much. We tend to overstress our bodies and minds, even when we don’t have the reason for it. We take things harshly and close to our hearts, because we care. We want everyone to be happy, but much like everyone else, we also deserve our speck of happiness as well.
Therefore, no matter how many children you have, don’t get your mind wrapped around numbers. Make sure you take the time to rest and indulge yourself, before you can make your children or partner happy. You got this!